Assistant to the President Do-Over

Well, the Phil Fulmer assistant to the president saga continues.

Now, UT wants us to believe that Phil, in fact, had not officially accepted the job, he was only considering it. And he has declined the position. I'm CERTAIN it's mere coincidence that, after the PR backlash, he decided he didn't want to take the cushy $12,500-per-month position, but rather a volunteer gig. Yeah right!

I love my alma mater, but we seem to have a terrible streak of stupid presidents this past decade. This is yet another exhibit in the stupid president gallery.

Can someone check Pat Summitt's calendar and see if there's any way she'd have time to squeeze in UT president along with her coaching duties?

More on "Special Assistant" Fulmer

I don't think I even need to give commentary. I'm simply going to post links to two separate articles that appeared in yesterday's Knoxville News Sentinel.

Specifics of the $6 million buyout

Irate UT Faculty

That first one has inspired me. I think I'm going to perform so poorly on my job that I get fired, then demand that I still be paid my full salary for the next 48 months, while the league also assumes my car payment for that period. It's an ingenious plan, really.

I Need to Find My Christmas Cheer

Probably not a great idea to make a blog entry when I'm cranky, but alas, I got two things to complain about:

1.) I am beyond irked with Brighthouse Networks. OVER them. First, they hijack our DVR a couple of months ago and fill it with software that is crappy at best. Slow. Hard to navigate. Annoying. Those are just a few words I would choose to describe the "upgrade" to our box.

If that weren't enough to put a bee in my bonnet, tonight I get home from work to find that a grand total of about six channels are functioning. All the others are black. I tried to call customer service, but all I get is the obnoxious busy tone. I'm sure they just quit answering the phones after the first dozen or so irate customers. Hey BH, here's a suggestion. If you don't want irate callers, offer decent service!

2.) As I sit her surfing the net since I can only choose between Jeopardy and Dr. Phil at the moment, I run upon a Knoxville News Sentinel article noting that Phil Fulmer has been hired for a three-month stint as "special assistant to the president." OK. I'd be fine with that fact alone. I'm in favor of Fulmer having some official capacity (besides football coach) at UT for years to come.

Herein lies my gripe. This little gig is slated to pay ol' Phil $12,500 per month. ARE YOU SERIOUS?!!! The article alleges that the money is coming from private contributors, but I really don't care. For him to be taking home $12,500 a month when he's already set to collect nearly $7 million to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING after running our football program into the ground is absolute nonsense.

Go look on the job listings at utk.edu right now. You'll see most every position, including those for which they require or prefer a college degree, pays $10 an hour or less. A well-paid staffer at UT is taking home far less in an entire year than money bags Fulmer will make in just three months as a "special assistant."

Folks, I think that's garbage. Absolute garbage. The real workers on campus are scraping by with part of their annual salary going to pay for a campus parking pass, mind you, and the already filthy-rich Fulmer's making $12,500 a month. That's just wrong.

The older I get, the more I see it's true...the rich really do get richer.

Thanksgiving and a New Era in Tennessee Football

It might be a little odd to combine Thanksgiving and a new Tennessee football coach into a single post, but alas, for the sake of time, I shall.

I'll take Thanksgiving first. I would be remiss if I didn't say how much I enjoyed Thanksgiving this year! I'd had to spend the last two Thanksgivings working Division III soccer, so just having the entire weekend off was a blessing unto itself! I joined Carrie's family in Port Orange Wednesday through Saturday evening. It was a great time, and Carrie's mom prepares one heckuva feast!

With the weather being sunny and mild, we took the boat to Disappearing Island for a picnic on Friday. We wore pants and the wind was chilly enough to prompt jackets when the boat was moving, but it was a beautiful afternoon. The weather was much the same on Saturday, and Carrie had the idea to go to the Ponce Inlet lighthouse, which was fun. The view was spectacular, and heavens knows I needed to climb all those steep steps to work off the loads of food I'd consumed for three days!

So now it's officially on to Christmas season, which is always a fun...and busy... time of the year.

And now, to Lane Kiffin. As most sports fans have likely heard, my alma mater tabbed 33-year-old Kiffin as the next head coach at UT. I really don't have a strong opinion one way or the other at this point. Obviously, I hope he does a stellar job, but we won't know how it will all shake out for at least a couple of years, I imagine.

That stated, I'll tell you one thing I do know: Close-ups of Coach Kiffin on the sidelines will be far more pleasant than those of Coach Fulmer! I mean, the guy's essentially my age, and let's call it as it is, he's not bad to look at! Here's hoping his coaching skills match his face! ;-P

Also speaking of the change in regime in Big Orange Country...I'm glad Phil Fulmer went out with a pair of victories. I was among his critics, but it was great to see him carried off Shields Watkins Field on the shoulders of his players, a win going down as the final note in his lengthy chapter at the helm. Fulmer had some great teams and coached some ultra talented players, and we can only hope we're headed back to those days!

Reflecting on Three Decades

Well, today's the day. I have, indeed, turned the big 3-0. Three decades. That's a long time! Thinking of this milestone has caused me to reflect on some of the biggest events of these first three decades. Things that come to mind, in chronological order:

In 1989, my mom and I became members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I don't think I fully appreciated the significance of that milestone until I got older. To say it's been a tremendous blessing and had a wonderful impact on shaping the person I am would be a huge understatement.

In May of 1997, I graduated from South Greene High School, the co-valedictorian of my class, no less. I say that not to brag so much as to prove that, if I can do it, anyone can with some effort and determination. I was nowhere near the smartest kid in my class, but I'd guess I put in more work than the other kids.

In August 1997, I began my adventures at the University of Tennessee. I can safely say those were the best years of my life to date. It was also at this time that I met Carrie, my roommate, who shockingly enough, is STILL my roommate! She's been a great friend and confidant, and we've shared some good laughs over a decade. Kelly and Jenny were also part of the good times back in those days, but alas, through it all, the original roommates are still roommates. It would be impossible to list all the memories from those years in one blog.

In May 2001, our fun times in Knoxville came to an end, as we graduated from the College of Communications. Seven years later, I still find myself longing for football Saturdays and having all my meals available at the swipe of a card. I don't, however, miss the busy work and writing research papers! Somehow I managed to be the top graduate in the College of Communications in the Spring 2001 commencement. I'll refer back to my comments about high school graduation to explain that feat. I'm telling you, if I can do it, anyone can!

Just a few days after our graduation, we hit the road to move to Orlando. This was no small move since most everyone who grows up in Greeneville, Tennessee, STAYS in Greeneville, Tennessee! I've missed my family every day since then, but it's proved to be a great decision. I've matured a lot living so far away, and I'm proud of the self-reliance it has fostered. And hey, let's be honest, if you're going to move away from home, Orlando's a pretty cool place to be. :-)

Of course there are a million other things that have happened over the course of three decades, but those are the biggies. Certainly along the way I've met some wonderful people who have been tremendous friends and mentors and played a significant part in my life. I'm grateful for each and every one of you!

I've been remarkably blessed in these first 30 years. God has truly been good to me and my family. Here's hoping my "next 30 years" (as the great philosopher Tim McGraw sings) will go just as well, if not better. I've experienced much, but there's MUCH more to come. I look forward to the journey!

"Free Soccer" Abounds

Growing up in the South, I'm not much of a soccer fan, and I've never made any secret of that fact. However, I have to say, I saw some exciting soccer this weekend at our conference's women's soccer tournament.

A total of five matches comprised the tournament, and all five went into overtime. Four of the five went to double-overtime, with three of those ending in penalty kick shootouts. Kudos to Saint Leo's senior goalkeeper, Lauren Hudson, who not only held her own TWICE against the firing squad, but also converted one of the PKs herself in Sunday's final. That would be the equivalent of sending your pitcher out to take bats in the home run derby. Unreal!

In addition to the thrillers, we were treated to spectacular weather for this weekend's tournament. Beautiful blue skies and sunshine were the backdrop for some exciting games. So, even though I had to watch three soccer matches in two days, and even though the last of those three kept me out of church, all-in-all, I'd say we had a pretty good event.

Election Night Thoughts

As I sit here watching Barack Obama and his "blue states" dominate the election coverage, a number of thoughts come to mind. I shall pose a number of questions, some of them at the risk of coming across as a racist:

1.) Does anyone else find it comical that we have a live remote from Kenya when, in reality, Obama's Kenyan father had essentially no role in his upbringing?

2.) Does it require a math major to figure out that Obama is the same percentage white as he is black?

3.) If you're the McCain campaign, and you know you're fighting a losing battle, why would you not feel compelled to match the phone campaign of Obama's party?

4.) How did we survive before these high tech, touch screen, color coded maps?

5.) How can Charlie Gibson and the ABC crew call a state for either candidate when the writing at the bottom of the screen indicates that only one percent of the ballots have be counted?

The Deed is Done

Well, my pink slip proved to be prophetic when I posted it on Saturday night. I will admit, though, that I didn’t expect an announcement – if there were one – to come until after the season.

I’ve been very vocal in my discontent with Phil Fulmer and the direction of the Tennessee football team this season. I’ll stand by that. Nevertheless, it’s a sad day for Tennessee athletics. It’s sad that a man who has cemented his status in Volunteer football lore had to go out on such a bitter note.

However, it’s also sad that Fulmer couldn’t adjust his strategies to the current environment of college football. It’s further sad that his teams have shown a gross lack of discipline, both on the field and off, for at least five years.

Anyone who has followed Tennessee athletics over the years has come to associate Fulmer and Pat Summitt with the Big Orange. The difference between the two is that Pat has been smart enough to adjust her approach and her schemes as women’s basketball has evolved. She recruits a different type of player now than she did when she won her first title in 1987.

Unfortunately, Fulmer didn’t display that same adaptability. He kept recruiting the same type of player and calling the same plays that succeeded when the Vols won the national title 10 years ago. The problem is, the rest of the college football world has moved on to a different style of play and differently skilled athletes. So when Tennessee took the field against the Floridas and Alabamas of the world, they were at a glaring disadvantage before the coin was even flipped.

I can understand why Fulmer’s players were upset that their coach was being dismissed. I sure would have like to have seen that same fire before now, though. Where was all that bottled up passion before yesterday’s press conference? Maybe if these guys had taken the field with that same level of energy and determination, things never would have come to this point.

I could go on and on, but the bottom line is, I think the decision was the right one. I’m not necessarily a fan of UT AD Mike Hamilton. But I think he got this one right. When you reach a point where you’re always saying, “Well, next year…,” there comes a time when you have to stop and assess why “next year” keeps getting pushed back yet again.

Is it scary to think Tennessee football could join the frustrated ranks of Nebraska and Michigan, who are stuck in mediocrity since making tough coaching changes? Absolutely. The Big Orange faithful can only hope we don’t find ourselves in the same mess. However, we’ll never know what may lie ahead until we count our losses and move forward.

I recall another not-so-distant controversial decision by Hamilton to fire men’s basketball coach Buzz Peterson. The Vols weren’t bad under Peterson. In fact, they were quite decent by Tennessee men’s basketball standards at that time. My how those standards have changed since a guy named Bruce Pearl rolled into town. No one with a fragment of a brain would dispute the rejuvenation that new coach brought.

Here’s hoping yesterday’s move is the first step toward a Pearlesque revival for Tennessee football. Only time will tell.

Nuff Said

SEC Beatdowns Continue

What in the world do we have to do to get an exciting SEC showdown these days?! Every Saturday, we get excited over a match-up that has the makings of a great game, only to see it evolve into a lopsided blowout.

Georgia pounded Alabama. Georgia stomped LSU. Florida whooped LSU. Florida whipped Georgia.

I'd be all for an exciting game once in a while. I mean, I'm out of shape, but I think my heart can take it.

Speaking of blowouts, as I type this post, South Carolina is up 14-0 on Phil Fulmer's hapless Vols. That's encouraging. If Tennessee's pitiful offense can overcome a 14-point deficit, I'll be beyond shocked.

Just Pat Being Pat

My admiration for Pat Summitt is well chronicled, and Friday, I read something in a write-up that perfectly proved why.

It is true I grew up idolizing the Lady Vols. And it is true that Pat Summitt is the winningest coach in all of collegiate basketball. But alas, those aren't the only reasons for my admiration. I have always had the utmost respect for Pat as a person...someone who has tremendous character.

The following story, written by my ABSOLUTE favorite Lady Vol beat write, Maria M. Cornelius, illustrates this point perfectly:

Summitt was a tad late to practice Thursday, but it was for good reason.

When arriving for a scheduled appointment she noticed a senior citizen in the four-story parking garage. After leaving her appointment shortly thereafter she saw the same woman. The layout of the garage was such that it was confusing if the person forgot the parking level or got off on the wrong floor.

Summitt stopped her car, introduced herself and offered to help find the woman’s car. The woman, grateful for the help, told Summitt that she knew who she was and got in the passenger seat.

“I didn’t want her to be afraid if she didn’t recognize me,” Summitt said. “She’d be afraid to get in the car. She was walking up and down inside the garage. She reminded me of my mother.”
Summitt drove through the garage until they found the vehicle, and then the coach scooted to practice.

Folks, this woman is not only one of the best coaches to ever hold the title. She's a tremendous human being who has always remained true to her modest Tennessee upbringing.

Midnight Strikes

Unfortunately, the clock struck midnight on the Tampa Bay Rays' Cinderella season. Despite overcoming my ALCS jinx, the last-to-first squad ran out of steam against the Phillies. Even a two-day "time out" wasn't enough to get the scrappy squad back on track.

Kudos to the Rays, though. It was a darn good season. Down the stretch, I figured they'd lose their steam before they made it to the playoffs. Then, I doubted they'd win in the first round. Surely, I thought in true "Debbie Downer" fashion, they wouldn't make it past the Red Sox. But alas, they proved me wrong each time and convinced me to watch a little baseball along the way. Not bad for a season's work.

Jinx

Anyone who cares to know has surely seen by now that, shortly after my props to the Rays, the team imploded and gave up eight unanswered runs to lose 8-7 to the BoSox. Lesson learned by yours truly. I shall henceforth keep any praise to myself until all outcomes are final.

On a separate but related note, I'm now feeling uneasy about the praise I heaped on the Titans two Sundays ago. Will my jinx continue??! :-O

Pacman & the Rays

I haven't had much time to write an entry lately, but I would like to weigh in on a couple of recent sports news items:

1.) So the NFL's biggest pariah, Adam "Pacman" Jones, has been kicked out of the league yet again. Well, I shouldn't say kicked out. To be fair, he's just been "suspended indefinitely" yet again.

Anyone who hasn't followed the ridiculous saga of Pacman clearly isn't a Titan fan. The Titan faithful are painfully aware of how quick that dope can wreck a team's P.R. efforts. I have a theory that part of the reason the Titans have been so successful this year is because they've purged the awful karma that was created by the Pacman the Pariah. Thank heavens that man is far, far away from the fine state of Tennessee!

Pardon me for laughing when Jerry Jones' win-at-all-cost approach blew up in his face compliments of none other than ol' Pac. Jones brings him to Dallas and assigns not one, not two, but FOUR bodyguards to follow Pacman around and keep him out of trouble. So how does Pacman respond? Why, he picks a fight with one of the bodyguards, of course!

The guy clearly has no self control. Let's put this in perspective. Everyday in this country, parents trust teenage girls to care for their young children. A 15 year-old-girl can handle a rambunctious group of kids. Yet, here we are, watching the fate of an adult man who is so out of control that his boss employed FOUR ADULT MALES to babysit him...and he still got in trouble!

Kudos to NFL commish Roger Goodell for not buying into Jerry Jones' lame attempts to pass off Pacman's latest brawl as innocent horsing around. SOMEONE needs to step in and show this guy the discipline that he needed many years ago before he reached this level of immaturity and irresponsibility. I believe in second chances, and maybe even third. But I don't believe in 15th chances.

2.) All aboard the Tampa Bay Rays' bandwagon! How 'bout them Rays?! I will openly admit I'd never watched a Rays game until three days ago, and in fact, I really don't follow baseball that closely, period. But alas, I can't help but chuckle at the way the Rays have run roughshod over the Red Sox in this ALCS. I'm officially interested in postseason baseball now, thanks to the team up I-4 West. And let me tell you, any team that can draw my attention to baseball in late October is doing something right.

EDITED at 11:11 p.m. -- YIKES! I think I typed too soon. Those pesky Sox have scored four runs since I made those last remarks, closing the gap to 7-4 in the bottom of the 7th. Come on, Rays! Don't make me look like an idiot!

Another Saturday, Another Loss

Yuck, yuck, and more yuck. That's right, Phil. Cover your nose because this team STINKS!


So here we are, sitting at 2-4. Many in the Volunteer nation predicted we'd be in this unenviable position as soon as we lost to a UCLA team that featured a third-string offense in the season opener. And the best part? We could be 2-6 in two weeks. Next on the docket is a Mississippi State team that knocked off a solid Vanderbilt team today. If the scrappy Bulldogs can beat Vandy, they can surely beat the hapless Vols. Then - gulp - the juggernaut that is Alabama rolls into Knoxville. I prefer not think too much about that at the moment.

I, for one, am still waiting to see our offense take the field after the half. Did it even come out of the locker room? Someone call the Athens police and file a missing persons report. I never seemed to see our offense after halftime. Perhaps that was because the term "3 and out" was nowhere to be found in our defense's vocabulary. Even when we did manage to get Georgia in a third-and-long situation, I would say (to no one in particular, sadly), "Don't worry, Georgia. You'll get the first down." And they surely did.


I'm having flashbacks of Pat Summitt yelling to her Lady Vols, who were down to UNC in Cleveland a couple of years ago, "Can we get a stop? Are we capable of getting a stop?!" Someone needs get that clip and make our defense listen to it nonstop for the next six days.


I wish I could be a little optimistic and say things will look up. But alas, there is no up. Not so long as Phil Fulmer and the culture of underachieving is camped on Neyland Drive. Do we really think top recruits are going to come to a school where fans are so disgusted they don't even show up for games any more? Of course they're not. And who could blame them?

The Not-So-Great Debate

I'm a little tardy in weighing in on this one, but alas...

Can I just say I've had enough of the whole debate farce? In fact, I'd had enough after one of the darn things. I should have probably prefaced these remarks by saying I'm not into politics. Never have been. I grew disenchanted with the egotistic weasels in our nation's capitol long ago.

The thing that annoys me most about the debates is the fact that no one ever actually answers a question. They have their canned responses concocted, and that's what they spew, no matter what they may have been asked.

Moderator: "Senator, what color is your tie?"

Candidate: "Let me tell you about pork barrel spending and earmarks...."

Moderator: "Senator, perhaps you missed the question. What color is your tie?"

Senator: "For the past eight years, this country has been mismanaged...."

Ridiculous. Plain and simple. If these jokers aren't actually going to answer the questions that are on Americans' minds, then it's my humble opinion that we shouldn't let them hijack all the major networks and give them two hours to spout off the same three statements 40 times.

I'll sure be glad when this election nonsense is over. I wish I could say I have some confidence that things will improve once we have a new President, but unfortunately, I have doubts no matter which candidate may emerge as the mudslinging champion.

How 'Bout Them Titans?!

I would simply be remiss if I didn't make my very first legitimate post an ode to the Tennessee Titans. That's the 5-0 Titans, for those of you who may not be in the know. When I left to attend the last session of General Conference, they were down 10-6 to those pesky Ravens. Imagine my rapture when I got home to discover we'd pulled out a 13-10 win!

Who would have thunk it? I mean, we have a QB who's like 58. (No worries, Kerry, we still love you!) Our "starting QB" went headcase and was benched like the first game of the season. And yet, here we are sitting pretty at 5-0. Big time doings in Nashvegas. And do I even need to say that this Titan uprising couldn't have come at a better time for us Tennessee football faithful? I mean, the Vols sure haven't given us anything to cheer about.

I suppose that's enough of my euphoria for now. Here's hoping this post doesn't jinx our fine team come next week. Great, now I'm going to be paranoid all week...

EDITED to read: Actually, I should have been paranoid for TWO weeks, as the Titans had a bye week the Sunday after I posted these musings.

Welcome!

Welcome to my new blog, "Kelly's 2 Cents." My friend Maija has sold me on the benefits of a blog, and I figure I might as well put the ol' journalism degree to work. There's no telling what you may read when you drop in on any given day. We'll see what events inspire me to pull up the computer and, well, give my 2 cents. :-)